What happened to 2009? I felt like my year was split radically in two parts. Sometime around the end of May a lot of things in my life started changing dramatically. I feel like, in both halves of last year, I was riding a wave I enjoyed and am grateful to have been on- even if it was really hard to bear while I was under it. I can’t say i’ve been outrageously pensive about this year thus far. I am in an entirely different place than I was at this time last year- I feel like a very different person, and for that reason I have been unable to lend a lot of thought to what this next year might hold. I am here, in Santa Clarita, and I’m committed here to the people in my life, and to my store until November, and I’m very ok with it! For those of you who know me, you know this is a really big deal. I’ve battled with finding contentment in this city since I finished school in 2006 and there have been times when I’ve let myself live completely in hopes of getting out of here. I can’t say that desire is not entirely still there (cause it is), but it’s certainly got a much quieter voice right now then it did before. In 2009 I saw several major relationships with people come in and out (and, in many cases, back in) to my life. I hurt people, they hurt me, we learned through it, we became better as a result of it, and now we move forward. In 2009 I had to deal with the most difficult experience I’ve ever faced at work before and, without going into detail, saw my boss get fired as a result of it (this was a good thing). Shortly after that termination I had a new manager come into my store who believed in my abilities as her assistant, and saw me through to promotion. I now manage a little Starbucks in a slower part of town, but I work with some of the most amazing and dedicated people I’ve ever met on a daily basis. I’m honestly and genuinely humbled to have the responsibility of leading a team of that caliber, even if it is for a corporate coffee giant. I am seeing, more and more, that the power of servant leadership is not something to be taken lightly. In 2009 I took trips to San Fransisco, and San Diego, and spent more time in Los Angeles than I ever have (I also drove the 405 more times than I can count). In 2009 I acquired a taste for red wine , toy cameras, The Twilight Saga, Ikea Furniture (and interior design on the whole), Acai, Gin, Battlestar Galactica, tattoos, and- what I will call- melodic folk music. Above all things, and I mentioned it earlier on in the post, I rediscovered some of the most valuable friendships my life has ever seen. I have never felt so positively that a group of people would be in my life so consistently, and so thoroughly as the ones that are here now. In March one of my best friends will marry the girl he’s been dating for three years. I’ve seen them go through hell, high water, and back, and can’t put the excitement I have to see them finally married to words. Even more strange, and difficult to describe, is the thought that I am going to be part of that wedding. That, when Nathan and Amanda show their wedding pictures to their children I will be in them.
All of this to say, 2010 does not promise to be an exceptional year, just a year, but that’s not a bad thing. The nuances, and subtitles of life are something 2009 has taught me to value more than I ever did. What I can say is that I find relationships and people more valuable, more beautiful, and sometimes more difficult than I did in 2008 and I think it has changed me in some ways.
and so, heading into 2010, we keep breathing, we keep living, we keep moving- and it’s a good thing!
-Catlin
a density of soul 
Posted on January 3, 2010
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